Sex and the Ivy

Greetings from the City

Filed under: New York, Uncategorized — Elle November 24, 2006 @ 1:39 pm

For those who I haven’t called or emailed, just wanted to let you know that I made it safely to New York. I’m staying in the East Village tonight and heading to the Upper East Side tomorrow. Tons of undetermined plans, lots of spontaneous shopping, and general mischief all around. I have the feeling that running around the city solo will be a great break from school. I’m probably crazy to travel this impulsively but whatever.

The holidays make me miss everyone, so give me a call this weekend just to say hi … wherever you are. Happy Thanksgiving!

Best of … Bored at Lamont

Filed under: Adia, Best of, Blogging, Bored at Lamont, Celebrity — Elle November 21, 2006 @ 5:47 am

After a discussion about boredatlamont.com over dinner at Tanjore, Adia sent me the following message via Facebook …

Nov 20, 2006 at 8:22 pm

From: ***** *********
To: Lena Chen
Subject: teehee
Message: http://www.boredatlamont.com/?m=search&query=lena
apparently you discovered micronesia, let the dogs out, and circumcised a canadian. all in a day’s work!

Since I am a fan of pointless attention-whoring lists, here are related gems from boredatlamont.com:

i heard lena chen is the inspiration for anchorman
lena chen helped me with my groceries once
lena chen is like santa claus she comes once a year
lena chen let the dogs out
Lena Chen discovered micronesia
lena chen circumnavigated the world
lena chen can’t talk about fight club but she can talk about her menstrual cycle
lena chen visited the virgin islands they are the whore islands
god you people are making lena chen into the new chuck norris
Lena Chen insipired me to create a new anal sex position
lena chen had sex with chuck norris and survived to blog about it
lena chen is going to blog about this in 15 minutes

Critics and Comments

Filed under: Blogging — Elle @ 5:33 am

For future reference, if you’re going to leave a comment, please write it under a real email address so that I can reply. I try to respond to as many readers as I can but that usually only entails writing to those leaving positive feedback, since critics rarely use their real contact information. Anyway, I was going to send the following email to the person who wrote a comment in my last entry:

I’m off to New York for Thanksgiving, but I’d love to do lunch next week (assuming you’re at Harvard). I think an in-person (or on the phone) discussion would be far more effective than Internet discourse. And I guess instead of basing assumptions on what you’ve heard or the contents of a web page, you could see for yourself what I’m like and make up your mind then.

If you read this thing (though I know you don’t like to), email me and we can do coffee.

Google Me

Filed under: Blogging — Elle November 20, 2006 @ 4:35 am

The list of search phrases this website shows up under never cease to amaze me. Here are the top ten:

1. sex and the ivy
2. lena chen
3. sexandtheivy
4. sex
5. boredatlamont.com
6. men who swallow
7. lena chen harvard
8. sex blogs
9. lena chen blog
10. cocktease

And my personal favorites (in no particular order):

1. should a person scratched by a stray be tested for hiv
2. asian woman freakish in bed
3. hard fucking mather
4. i slept my ex-boyfriend with my husband s understanding
5. sex ivy aidan ginormous
6. lamont library glory hole
7. sexy well endowed doctors
8. ivy league sex clubs
9. guys touch their pant crotch in public
10. how to make relationships less awkward

I think I’m going to bed

Filed under: Celebrity, Partying, Shopping, Terra — Elle November 18, 2006 @ 4:34 am

And I don’t even consider being underneath my covers at 3am, sane and sober, a complete tragedy. Usually, I’d have to be a drunk mess before declaring the evening over. But it’s too much work to have fun at this school and tonight I don’t have the energy. As I told JZ earlier on the phone, “I’m cold and underage.” That rules out waiting outside final club doors or hitting up a bar for overpriced, oversweetened drinks. Besides, Terra and I have blown our pride, livers, and budgets this past week. It’s time for damage control.

It’s funny that I find myself more together this weekend than I have in a long time. It’s the big Harvard-Yale football game tomorrow, and tonight was supposed to be fairly ridiculous, a night when gals like me push their limits beyond limits. But last year, I was surprisingly sober as well. I didn’t even drink a drop at the tailgate. I guess we’ll see how well I hold up tomorrow, but I get the feeling that I’ll remain cognizant and even responsible (well, maybe …)

Last night, a guy I’ve been spending time with (sweet, but fairly clueless) kicked me out of his room at 3am in the middle of the biggest storm Cambridge has seen this autumn. His reasoning? “If you stay, I’m not going to be able to fall asleep, and I have a third-round interview tomorrow.” I thought I had gotten used to the extent of this school’s ridiculousness, but that I just couldn’t stomach. Only at Harvard.

Tonight, I hit up Mather with Allie, Quincy with Adia, and Winthrop with HN. In between, I managed to run into four guys I slept with (at least). If this evening had a catchphrase, it’d be, “Shit. I think I fucked him.” I really need to transfer schools.

Also notable was hearing two Winthrop sophs yell my name while HN and I were walking down Mill Street. Typically when I fly solo, I get approached once or twice a night about my blog, and I write off these incidents as annoying occurrences. Not the case here. Not only was I fielding inquiries with HN in tow, but the kids who stopped me were girls. Plus, they acknowledged quite sweetly that they knew I didn’t like being approached. Chick fans are so rare and are definitely preferable to the sweaty, towering men who give off stalker vibes. Hyper, endearingly fanatic girls are just different. You’ve got to stop for them, even if it’s fucking freezing and you’re reconsidering your (lack of) wardrobe decision. I think HN was fairly bewildered, but it just goes to show that I do not make up this whole blog-intruding-on-life stuff.

Today’s epiphany in therapy: I exhibit impulsive behavior. I am self-destructive. I overindulge in sex, shopping, and food to distract from life’s problems. Basically, I’m just a big fucking mess. Let’s hope I get diagnosed with something soon so I can refer to an actual illness instead of vaguely saying, “I have mental issues.” Anyway, my therapist is right on mark with everything, but then again, I could probably give myself therapy. I feel like every conversation I have about my issues only leads to some new epiphany. Every week, I go into UHS with so many self-revelations that her job must be pretty damn easy.

As far as over-indulgence goes: tonight, Terra and I had a $100 dinner at Om. I also bought a case of Smirnoff Ice. An entire case. That’s lasting until next semester. Last Monday, I snagged red stilettos and purchased brown flats. They constituted the last part of my $650 shopping spree.

I know that flats are uncharacteristic of me, but I needed something appropriate for class. These are my new faves next to the purple BCBG stilettos. I probably like my collection of shoes more than any boy I’ve ever slept with. Ralph and Max are the most dependable men I know.

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