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Dear Riley
So a funny thing happened today. A slightly unhinged ex posted a comment on my blog and I suddenly realized why I punched you in the face.
Because you wouldn’t hit me back.
I knew you wouldn’t strike in return, follow me around, harass me, or otherwise retaliate. You were a harmless target for my anger and I was so angry, almost uncontrollably so. You were number four in a string of men who were seeing other women while involved/trying to get involved with me. It wasn’t fair and it wasn’t right, and while the former couldn’t be fixed because life, by nature, just isn’t fair, I thought I could even the score on the latter with a few uppercuts.
Obviously, I was wrong.
You weren’t the person I was really mad at. See, here’s the thing: I think you’re a good guy. You made a mistake, you apologized, and you meant it. The fact that everyone fucks up is a more or less accepted fact. What makes a person a decent individual is their willingness to acknowledge wrongdoing when their fucking up hurts someone else. When it comes down to it, you made a serious mistake, but you don’t deserve to be called a bad person anymore than you deserve to be punched in the face.
The same couldn’t be said for the much-older man who preceded you, a compulsive liar insistent to the end that the girls he two-timed were the real liars — fooling each other and themselves in the process. Nor could the same be said for my friend’s boyfriend who justified his propositioning me in a hotel room with the excuse that her insecurities encouraged him to. They are just the icing.
I have encountered man after man irresponsible with my heart and disrespectful of my dignity. In the grand scheme of things, what you did was so magnificently minuscule, so juvenile in its error, that it hardly merited my reaction. I didn’t hit you because you deserved it. I hit you because it was safe to and I thought it would make me feel better.
But it didn’t make me feel any better. It just made your face numb and my knuckles sore, not too unlike my heart. I was too drunk at the time to realize it, too heartsick afterward to mull on it, but really, I was just hitting a boy who already felt sorry when what I really wanted to do was punish a man who didn’t feel at all.
So for that, I’m sorry.
* Jesus Christ, before I get ad boarded, I asked Riley for permission to punch him before actually punching him. Just a clarification. Also, there are a bunch of insane comments posted by an ex. I’m not deleting them (he’d probably cry censorship), but I don’t think they’re worth responding to, especially given the number of times I’d simply say, “Patent lie.”
June 18th, 2007 at 6:01 am
Take the high road, Lena.
June 18th, 2007 at 4:17 pm
Whoa!! Just MORE proof of how FUCKED UP and actually certifiably/clinically psychotic Lena Chen is. This girl really takes delusional to a whole new level.
I’ve talked to some of her exes (including the “four” who she thinks she knows what she’s talking about when she mentions them) and they ALL have the SAME STORY. That she’s a pathological liar, living in a fantasy world, desperate for attention that her father and mother never gave her which she tries to make up for by sleeping with man after man (over 20 men have been there already and she’s only 19 years old!!!!) as if that will fill the black hole in her heart.
She’s permanently damaged goods that no guy wants once he finds out her true colors. She’s a lost cause who even the best therapist could NEVER fix because she doesn’t want to fix herself. In fact, she’s PROUD of her vindictive, soulless life, a life where she does ALL of the bad things to others that she accuses those same others of doing to her.
And now by her own admission, she has even risen to the level of physical abuse. Then she tries to make it all ok by saying that everyone makes mistakes and that forgiveness is right, even though she refuses to extend that same kind of forgiveness to others. What is crazier is that the people I talked to all said that there isn’t even anything to be forgiven for- that she acts without ever knowing the facts, creates false drama and validates her pathetic existence by entertaining her readers with lies. And she claims to have dignity? Nothing could be further from the truth. She doesn’t even have journalistic integrity. A number of people told me that she admits to them that she makes up stuff on her blog to keep her readers happy.
The worst of it is that she’s a “functional addict”. She appears like an innocent victim or an “average girl with problems” but she’s really the kind of person who would sleep with a guy and then set him up to be arrested for rape (I’m saying this with foundation. One of the guys I talked to told me that she threatened him with that, saying that no one would believe him and everyone would believe her and that she’d do it all in the name of women’s rights to make it look good). She thinks the way she lives is acceptable, is right, and even wants to convert others to it.
She’s the kind of person the world is better without because she’s nothing more than a cancer who leaves destruction and dismay and falsehoods wherever she goes.
The only thing anyone can really do is shake their heads in sadness, pray for her salvation and hope that they themselves don’t fall victim to her subhuman and sick mind.
June 18th, 2007 at 4:25 pm
And one more thing–does she have an entertaining blog? is she a good writer?
Yeah, she’s entertaining and a good writer, but, that doesn’t make her a good person. In fact, all of her talent and creativity is undermined by her actual character which is corrupt and rotten to the core.
Guys and girls everwhere– BEWARE!!!!!
June 18th, 2007 at 4:51 pm
iknowthetruth- All this hate that your harboring is only going to hurt you in the end. Rarely do relationships end a calm, friendly way. There is always blame to be placed on both sides, but airing this rage only leaves you looking jilted and immature. Why not handle this in a way that makes it seem like you took the high road? Bygones man, bygones.
June 18th, 2007 at 5:42 pm
Ive let bygones be bygones. I don’t really wanna deal with her anymore. But Lena STILL insists on creating drama and she won’t let things go (even about people she hasn’t been involved with for months). I’m not here to get involved in a bad situation all over again. But I can’t stand that she persists with a bad situation and a false persona and everyone who is so in love with her and her writing (even if it is the kind of thing they talk negatively about behind her back) needs to know the reality of the situation. Even more, they need to know the reaity of who she is. I’m not harboring any hate and it’s not about a “relationship which ended badly” (because we never really had one) it’s about protecting others from the same mistakes I’ve had to suffer though. I’m not hurt anymore, but I was and others don’t deserve the same fate. And the fact of the matter is this is something she repeats AGAIN and AGAIN with numerous people. This is about protecting OTHERS from a seriously twisted and dangerous person.
June 18th, 2007 at 6:03 pm
Stumbled upon the blog for the first time, except one quick glance a couple of months ago. Respect for the writing style. On a more personal note, this post made me think how often I punish all the wrong people - just because they _will_ be sorry, apologetic and even suffering, while the truth is, more often than not I am suffering for whatever I have inflicted upon myself, and I enjoy some company.
Oh, and best of luck dealing with assorted freaks.
June 18th, 2007 at 6:09 pm
Hey, iknowthetruth? Back off and get over yourself. All you’re doing is heaping on a bunch of generic slander, and no matter how many times you insist that it’s not slander and you’ve spoken with exes who all agree with your opinion, I’m not buying. You could probably set up your own blog with endlessly specific examples of what a BADOMGBAD person Lena is, and I still wouldn’t buy, because everything you’ve said so far has been colored with a snide hostility. Take a breath. Move on.
June 18th, 2007 at 6:22 pm
iknowthetruth - you sound ridiculous. you’re really not making a case for yourself by posting generic insults on someone else’s blog. get over it and avoid making yourself look more stupid than you already do.
June 18th, 2007 at 9:19 pm
Dear \”Iknowthetruth\” aka S*****a:
STFU and GTFO:
You are the type of man who puts women up on a convenient Madonna pedestal, and then when they show that they are flawed human beings, you turn them into unredeemable \”whores\”. Get your head out of your misogynistic ass.
June 18th, 2007 at 9:27 pm
And an extra treat because S*****a aka \”IKNOWTHETRUTH!!!!!1111!!!!\” thinks he\’s Fox Mulder: http://www.siteaboutnothing.com/images/i-want-to-believe.jpg
June 18th, 2007 at 9:58 pm
If you all knew the truth about Lena, you’d agree with IKNOWTHETRUTH. This comes from first hand knowledge.
June 18th, 2007 at 10:05 pm
A friend of a friend once got more or less the following advice from her mental health professional: “Based on your relationship history, you should treat the mere fact that you are attracted to someone as a huge red flag.”
June 18th, 2007 at 10:37 pm
JustSaying, don’t front, you’re obviously “IKNOWTHETRUTH”.
What exactly is the “truth” about Lena? It’s funny that people keep talking about it, but no one will say what “it” *is*.
June 18th, 2007 at 10:55 pm
No, Jessica, I’m not IKNOWTHETRUTH. The truth about Lena is that she lies about everything and that her need for drama drags others down with her. I am just saying that it doesn’t surprise me that someone would hate her so much.
June 18th, 2007 at 10:59 pm
This is from knowing her personally and through friends who also know her, in many different ways. Some have dated her and others are friends or acquaintances.
June 18th, 2007 at 11:06 pm
dear iknowthetruth,
pray tell, what IS the truth? when did lena ever lie to you? you’re the one who lied to her. the first time you fessed up eventually, the second time you did not. and the second time was much worse. you treated her poorly. why are you still hanging around in her life, posting horrible lies on her blog? get over yourself. YOU’RE the one with mental problems.
June 19th, 2007 at 12:01 am
hahahahha…All the cryptic and suspiciously unsubstantiated shit floating around sounds like it was created by some trashy fucktard with hollywood aspirations and B-movie talent. “The Truth About Lena.” In a quiet suburban neighborhood lived a seemingly innocent girl with an eye for expensive handbags and a charming predilection for drama. The neighbors found her lovely: “Oh that Lena. What a sweet, spunky girl.” The boys found her tempting: “I’d love to get my hands on that fine piece of Asian ass.” But what they didn’t know…could get them killed. AGHHHHHH! WHAAT?!?!?1 She’s a backstabbing prostitute on a murderous rampage???
(Inexplicable explosion)
The Truth About Lena
Comes to Theatres June 18th.
This film is not yet rated.
June 19th, 2007 at 12:58 am
“This is from knowing her personally and through friends who also know her, in many different ways. Some have dated her and others are friends or acquaintances.”
Yeah, and you still have not told us what the “Truth” is, Fox Mulder.
June 19th, 2007 at 1:00 am
Leave her alone. If you hate her so much, why do you keep coming here and wasting your time reading her blog? In my experience, if I hate someone, I waste none of my energy on them.
She’s a good writer and she seems like a good person–everyone has some flaws, that’s what makes us interesting. Even if she’s a horrific person in real life, oh well…some of my favorite writers are sucky people. But I don’t feel like she is…give her a break.
June 19th, 2007 at 3:21 am
:-X shucks
June 19th, 2007 at 9:13 am
If Lena’s so terrible, why keep involving yourself with her affairs? Let her go down her supposed black hole or whatever and do your own thing. Trolling this blog and posting countless (drunken?) screeds doesn’t say much for you, or your accusations.
June 19th, 2007 at 8:03 pm
If you hate her so much/don’t care about her, then why do you still read her blog?
June 20th, 2007 at 8:55 pm
Yeah i.k.t.t… she’s the one who’s really not letting this go…
June 21st, 2007 at 3:32 pm
[...] How have I never found this crazy blog before? [...]
June 25th, 2007 at 1:29 am
[...] For the most part, I try to keep this blog optimistic. I know that might seem like a shocker, but yes, this is actually the very censored, happy version of my life. For the uncensored version, you can check out these comments for an example of a romantic endeavor gone … well, insane. [...]
June 25th, 2007 at 1:59 am
Just wanted to throw this out there–I’m really confused on the slur about the black hole in her heart. Is it a black hole ‘of her heart’ that you mean to say, implying she has a critical density after some kind of heart-collapse and now sucks in everything, not even letting light escape? Or are we talking instead of a more generalized condition where she has a hole in her heart, maybe a leaky semilunar valve, and is trying to patch that up?
preposition use is important, be careful man, careful!
June 27th, 2007 at 12:00 am
Wow, first off… It’s really creepy that so many people, such as the random girls leaving comments here will never ever try to look at the argument from someone else’s point of view. And you try to make yourself heard by patronizing other posters. Oh, and words like “shit” and “fucktard” do not offset your immaturity, the only accentuate it.
I’m getting a suspicion that half the posters are simply here to keep adding drama to the blog. I mean, Lena seems like a devious drama queen and some people are trying to point it out. People like Lena are just there waiting for the first possibility to criticize the posters and show off. You know the very simple phrase “If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t talk” has a profound meaning. Now if the posters are actually lying about Lena being horrible, there is no harm since they advocate decency and honesty in human beings. But it is the bitchy conceited people who are closemindedly defending their own opinions or who continue this ridiculous charade without regard to the people who take these matters seriously that make this world a difficult place to live in. Heck, I probably lost my point but I hope this is something for everyone to think about. Criticism and advice are alright, but I am almost certain that someone may try to demean me and ridicule what I have said. It really doesn’t matter, if you want to do that then you are one of those people who refuses the possibility that someone else might have a sound point or idea.
I would be really happy if this entire blog were just a sociology experiment Lena is conducting to see what people are thinking… Otherwise, it’s scary to think how people like her might ruin the world.
July 19th, 2007 at 11:25 pm
[...] Riley — He had a girlfriend. Who I did not know about. And was my friend. And lived in a dorm five blocks from mine. Massive amounts of forgiveness (and a few punches!) later, we’re friends. [...]