Because I don’t. I know it’s hard to believe. People like to declare that they’re type-less and then they tack on the criteria of “as long as he’s not a Republican.” Me? I’ve dated a Republican.
You would think that it might be tougher to date someone of a different cultural or religious background. Well, not for me. Republicanism might as well be the Christianity of a foreign land named Coulterville. I spent my entire relationship with Summer Guy attempting to ignore the fact that I was sleeping with the enemy, but at the end of it all, I learned a lot about myself. My views on race, poverty, and gay rights came out stronger, because his (facetious) challenges to them made me think critically about why I believed the things I did.
(A year and a half later, it now looks like he’s on the verge of a conversion to my god. Can’t help but feel a little smug about that.)
I was fairly non-discriminatory even before the Republican, but I think I’m even more so now. Race, religion, profession, education, class, whatever: as long as the guy’s tolerant and intelligent, none of it really matters. Just about the only criteria of late is age and even that’s rather lax (within five years of my own — and obviously, no 15-year-olds). Further, I don’t merely claim to be an equal-opportunity bed partner. I actually am in practice. Thanks to public misconception and a ton of presumption, I get quite a bit of criticism for only dating or sleeping with white guys, which pisses me off because that’s indicative of major stereotyping of Asian women. The actual racial breakdown in my history between white vs. everything else? Probably closer to 70-30, which is within five percentage points of Harvard’s actual demographic makeup.
Still, I think I go through phases — trends, if you will — during which I become fond of a certain kind of guy. For example, I’ve hooked up with three rugby players, which is pretty disproportionate for someone with only one friend on an athletic team. It’s also with bemusement that I’ve noticed my recent liking for less corporate and more creative types as well as — drumroll, please — undergrads! Crushes and hook-ups from late summer to mid-autumn include: an actor, a photographer, a couple NYU guys, four writers (three professional, one aspiring), a tech geek, a Currierite, another Harvard junior, and a grad student doing something other than law/medicine/business. A diverse bunch, but none are cubicle-bound.
So in the interest of kicking off an interesting comment thread, here’s my ideal type at the moment. He may or may not actually exist in real life.
(Also, notice that race is as close as I get to discussing looks when it comes to type. I don’t have a type in terms of looks either, though I admittedly err toward the darker-featured. Every guy I get involved with is gorgeous in my eyes … as he should be!)
Religion: Agnostic, whatever he can get, “spiritual”
Education: In school, whether it’s undergrad or grad
Bad Habits: Poor hygiene and messiness unacceptable, drug use tolerable.
Super Powers: Enough tech savvy to resuscitate my website when I do something stupid to it, culinary expertise, and tolerance for my “quirks” (also known as “my friends”). Just kidding, I love you guys.
Other Important Stuff: He must like sushi and be well-read.