Since I had my last sections and lectures of the semester today, I feel totally free to reveal the following:
* Some people check their email during lecture. I do that too. But also, I cyber, which is why I have that creepy smile on my face.
* When I get really engrossed in a book and the professor directs us to a selection in it, I will often spend lecture finishing the book instead of paying attention to the professor. This is possibly the geekiest form of distraction ever.
* Section is fantastic because there’s such a diverse selection of guys I can fantasize about. Like the one who barges in fifteen minutes late every week from practice all panting and sweaty; or the cute one who makes cute points in his cute accent; or the stuttering, German philosophy-citing one who definitely thinks he’s smarter than the TF. Oh, and the hot TF. I definitely fantasize about him too.
* I know you judge me for my pink laptop but I don’t give a damn, fuckers. It’s not my fault you’re a conformist.
* If I seriously have no idea what is going on in a course, I purposely choose a seat outside the line of a TF’s vision and lock my eyes to the coursebook. No one ever really gets called on unless they want to speak, but I do this just in case I actually land in a section in which there are no overeager handraisers. Who am I kidding? There’s always a Harvard kid who gets jittery if he hasn’t heard his own voice in the past five minutes.
* See me furiously typing away as the prof covers a coup d’etat, two wars, and a crusade in one hour? That shit is boring. I’m obviously working on my memoir.
Of course, seeing as how I’m a junior, I’ll be in classes again in four months. So maybe I shouldn’t have written this. Oh well, what do I know about being a student anyway? I’m hardly ever on campus since I sleep in Boston and run off to New York at any given chance. As my friend Zac said, “Lena Chen isnâ€™t actually an enrolled student at Harvard. She just hangs out on campus for a few days straight once every 3 or 4 weeks.”